Variations on a Theme: Themeless

Third Time Wife, Wedding Planning
Moroccan-themed dining room with alcoves, windows and a wine glass.

Maybe a Moroccan theme? Maybe not?

I was a band geek. In high school I spent 4 years compromising other bits of my schedule, missing out some great classes with the rest of my fellow gifted students, just so that I could keep my band status current. One year it even meant enrolling in Jazz Band (and switching instruments for the semester) just so I could take a class that was only offered during one period that I had to have for my Senior Year externship.

And if you were in band, you were in Marching Band. Our director, as the story goes, was not actually fond of marching band. But the principal loved it so perform we did. My freshman year our program consisted of 3 latin-style songs follow by, of all things, “He Ain’t Heavy, He’s My Brother” as our closer. The huh?

Sophomore and Junior years continued just as theme-less and I repeatedly petitioned the director for a themed show–one that made sense for pete’s sake! Finally, my Senior Year, our songs all came from Aladdin. By then I was on the Flag Corps for the marching season and you could not have found a happier girl. Even when we (the flag corps) only got 2s at Festival.

So it’s no surprise that when I plan a party there’s always a theme involved. A new project? I bet it started with a snappy name that directs the goals and visions for the final result. Dreaming in technicolor? Oh, yeah, there’s a single idea behind it all.

Except… when I thought about our wedding I was themeless.

It’s like being clueless but more frustrating.

I knew some things we weren’t going to do: anything that had been a major player in our previous weddings (big church ceremonies, no duplicating first dance songs, that sort of thing) and a few things I really wanted to include (dancing, a wine ceremony, comfort and ease). But there was no single, cohesive thread to stitch the bits together. I didn’t even have a color scheme in mind! (gasp!)

I voiced my confusion to Todd.

“Do we have to have a theme?” he replied.

Bless his heart.

I suppose, in truth, we don’t have to have any more cohesion than “we like this/we don’t like that.” But a theme helps. Not only does a theme contribute to easier decision making (does it go with the theme? yes or no) it helps the individual pieces of the ceremony and reception fit together like happy little cogs in our machine. Or–to be a little more modern–like sectors on our communal harddrive. Have you ever had a bad sector? It causes bumps and slow-downs and, eventually, a massive harddrive fail. We do NOT want a wedding harddrive fail.

So I was on the hunt for a theme.

Pretty Book and Flower Icon

Is having a theme as important to you as it was to me?
For you theme-less brides out there, what’s your decision process like without a theme to go by? 

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