64 Arts

the 10th Art: Bed Arrangement

64 Arts

Covered with colored fabrics, placed in the center of the room, for taking meals.

Okay: first thought is that bed and couch are somewhat interchangeable here and we’ve got a similar vibe going here as in ancient Rome where they ate reclined on couches not sitting at a table. So beds, couches, tables and chairs and anything else we deem appropriate will be covered over the next few weeks. Starting with…

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After the shell-shock of my first divorce (at age 22) wore off, I eased back into the dating scene with an eye more towards Mr Right, not Mr Right-Now. There were a lot of phone calls, plenty of emails and first “dates” at bookstores, parks and other neutral grounds.

For the few who made it to that stage there was often an invitation to the guy’s home with the lure of cooking dinner together (this is what happens, by the way, when you’re dating while in Culinary School–or at least what happened to me!). Over time I began to notice a pattern.

Now, I’d read somewhere that dating a guy who sleeps in a twin bed is never going to go anywhere. Why? Well, if there’s no room for you in his bed, there’s no room for you in his life.

And while this advice did seem to be holding out true more often than not, I developed a set of corollaries to this “rule” that I will now share:

Size Matters

Twin Bed: Exercise caution. Even if you’re not planning to sleep with him any time soon, it’s still worth considering  that even if you wanted to, you couldn’t.

Full or Double: Totally acceptable (providing the pillow option doesn’t apply–see below). Says there’s room for growth.

Queen: No worries here!

King: Probably okay, especially if he’s really tall and needs the length. But beware: king beds can be party beds. I know more than one guy who had a king bed so he could have more than one extra person in there with him

Pillow Talk

One pillow: Back to square one–no room for your head, no matter how big the bed.

Two pillows: Better–as long as he doesn’t use both for himself.

Three pillows: I think this is the sweet spot–you’re guaranteed at least one pillow for your use, even if you’re just watching television together.

Throw pillows: Warning! Warning! Danger Will Robinson! How many men do you know that have throw pillows of their own volition? Yeah, me neither. Possible sources of the throws…

  • Sister or Well-Meaning Female Friend: Safe zone. These girls help out hoping that it helps to guy out. Usually just to make him happy in the end. Very cool.
  • Mother: A little dicey. It’s a little bit of the same motivation of the sister/friend but it can also signal a mama’s boy. Here in the south I think we’re absolutely lousy with mama’s boys and it’s seldom a good thing. Those apron strings need to be cut! And even worse are pillows (or, well, anything ) that Mom picked out before she died–I don’t care how hideous it is, you will never get rid of it!
  • Professional Decorator: Could go either way. On the one hand, it says that he wants to have a nice place and is willing to pay someone who knows better to do it. On the other hand, it could signify he’s high maintenance–maybe higher than you. Are you willing to chance it?

Of course nothing is ever set in stone. These aren’t rules, just observations I’ve pieced together over several years of dating.

True story: Todd and I met online (as some of you know) and were 4 states away from each other for the first 9 months or so. It wasn’t until I was totally head-over-heals for him that I learned that he didn’t even own a bed. Due to his post-divorce bachelor status and the size of his rental home (600 square feet, if I remember correctly) he slept in his very large recliner and used the tiny bedroom as an office.

So, you know, there are exceptions to every rule. We’ve been together over 2 years, now, and are still going strong. With a double bed.

Progress Pictures: Broken Ties

64 Arts, Projects

Now that I’ve told the story of what inspired the change from trivet to mixed media art, I thought it’d be a good idea to share some in-progress pictures for those that are interested in processes.

prepping the canvas board

Prepping the Canvas Board

First I went a little Jackson Pollock-esque on a spare piece of canvas board–always helps to have extra art supplies around. Don’t agree and hate the extras that come in packs? Email me for my address–I’ll take ’em off your hands.

Actually, even better would be to donate them to your local school system, Ronald McDonald House, nearest Children’s Hospital or Boys and Girls Clubs.

Messing it all Around

Smearing the paint splatter

Next I took a large paintbrush and spread all the splatters around. Since I didn’t need a particular look for the background–most of it ended up covered, anyway–it didn’t need to really look like anything. I added a few more drops of the red, which mostly disappeared, and swirled it with a skewer (leftover from mixing the plaster to make the heart-shaped base.

Mapping out item Placement

Mapping Out Ephemera Placement

While the canvas dried (took overnight since some of the paint was more piled on than others) I worked on the placement of some key items for the mosaic. Some things, like the earring I bought with her while on Sr Trip and the half of the friendship charm from middle school, were directly related to she and I and others were items that I found while digging out the other bits from my old jewelry box or found around the craft room.

These things I wanted in a specific spot so arranged them and then drew a rough outline in pencil to know where not to put the stones and beads and stuff. The glue that gets brushed over the entire surface is clear so you can still see your road map.

Before the Grout

Before the Grout

Again, I’m still astonished at how the grout really pulls all the disparate items together. I mean, yeah, this looks like a total hodge-podge in a what-was-I-thinking sort of way, but it gets better. Never give up, never question, just dive on in.

Great Grey Gobs of Gritty Grout

Great Grey Gobs of Gritty Grout

This is a mid-grout picture. Gorgeous, huh? This was not what I meant when I said it gets better.

Some things were too delicate to glue directly to the plaster, so after I put on the grout and worked it into all the nooks and crannies and leveled certain parts of it I then added the smaller elements to the wet grout. The idea was that they would stick in and save me extra gluing. This mostly worked, some things needed a bit of help.

All Cleaned Up and Nowhere to Go

All Cleaned Up and Nowhere to Go

After 10 minutes I could start removing the extra grout and excavating beads and glass and all. It really did feel like an archaeological dig–hey, great idea for summer projects (outside projects) for bored kids–carefully washing away the extra grout and grit. I managed to uncover almost everything that was supposed to show.

Important lesson: it helps to have things all the same depth. Not only does this lend to a smooth surface, it makes it easier to wipe away excess grout instead of having to dig for it. Tiny stuff can get glued on.

Broken Ties by "Scraps"

the Finished Piece: Broken Ties

After the grout dried I sorta stopped with the picture taking. Basically I was so caught up in the collage part of things that I was just zooming through and not thinking about the blog. But here’s what I did to finish up:

  • pulled out some pictures of her and I, tore one of the two of us at my wedding in half
  • flipped through a nearby Glamour for words and images that worked for the theme or that reminded me of us way back when
  • collaged the painted background with PVA glue (neutral pH adhesive, aka book glue) and a foam brush, diluted the remaining glue and brushed over the whole thing
  • sprinkled on some seed beads to see what would stick
  • adhered the mosaic pieces to the background with a 2-part epoxy–incredibly strong hold, incredibly strong smell; a well ventilated area is key
  • surrounded the mosaic with pearl beads attached with hot glue, added extras to corners and added a few more bits of ephemera
  • took the whole thing outside and sprayed with pink spray paint to make it all blend a little more
  • added captions and notes with silver permanent marker

I still have yet to clean off my work table 😉

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So, do you like seeing things like this–process pictures and descriptions–for a project like this or do you just want to see the finished product?

the Finished Trivet

The Finished Trivet

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It’s always fun to finish a project, right? Well, this is no exception.

I’ll be honest: I’m great at starting things. I’d even go so far as to say I’m great at coming up with ideas and plans and researching hows and whys and all. But finishing things? Sometimes it’s tough going not to get distracted by the next fun idea. It’s like projectile-ADD… or something like that. Something that sounds less gross?

And when I decided to go in a different direction with the heart trivet and turn it into a mixed media piece? Yeah, it was almost too easy to set the normal trivet aside and get absorbed in the offshoot.

But I had a little talk with myself. It went something like, “hey, wait, before you take off those gloves and let the grout dry, it looks like you’ve got enough to do the square one, too, and that way you only have to deal with the mess once, right? Doncha think we might?”

Apparently my creative side can be swayed by reason and logic. On occasion. But let’s not make a habit of it.

At any rate, I did get it finished.

Trivet In Progress

Pre-Grouting

the Finished Trivet

Post-Grouting

What a difference some grout makes, huh? I was really shocked how much the grout toned-down the brightness of the tiles. It probably has something to do with the light not being able to bounce around them as much (what will all but one side of each blocked in).

In the future I need to work on my edges: they sort of taper in some areas and that’s not always a desired feature. Still, it was a fun learning experience, a little messy and ultimately turned into a finished, functional item.

And that’s even better than perfect.

Art Therapy: Broken Ties

64 Arts

As I was taking the plaster out of the molds I learned (the broken way) that the heart-shaped plaster base wasn’t quite dry enough to handle.

Oops.

So a few little pieces have now broken off and sit to one side.

I thought I could maybe fix it. After all, I’ve got plenty of glues and, once dry, it could be pieced back together and the mosaic and grout would cover it. Sure, the cracks would still be there but no one would see them.

*  *  *

I was luck to meet my best friend  in middle school, and we were inseparable for 6 years. She stood up for me at my first wedding and consoled me when my future mother-in-law called me an ungrateful little bitch just hours before we stood before the preacher.

We grew apart as I tried to deal with a marriage that wasn’t exactly made in heaven and, eventually, ended. On my own again, I tried to reconnect. In school we loved to go to dances so as adults: we went to clubs. One night we were going out and she had to get “permission” from her on-again/off-again boyfriend for where we were going. We deviated from that plan towards the end of the night wee hours of the morning, and she called to tell him where we were (nice public place, grabbing a bite to eat with some new friends I’d made).

He made her choose: leave now, or she’d never see him again. Furthermore, I later found out, he made her choose between him and me. She chose him. She no longer returned my calls. And when I saw her in traffic one Saturday I followed her, trying to get her attention, to her Mom’s apartment, and she told me she couldn’t talk to me again, and asked me to understand.

I didn’t understand, not really, but I did as she asked. A few months later I got a letter (care of my Mom’s address) trying to explain and saying maybe we’d meet up again at the reunion.

It’s been 10 years. They didn’t make it to the reunion in 2004. They’re still together, married, and (from what I hear) happy. And I’m happy for her even though I’ve never been a fan of his (and I knew him years before I met her). Thursday was her birthday and, well, it stung not being able to email or call to wish her a happy one. I’m still trying to be a friend by honoring her wishes.

*  *  *

10 years weren’t enough time to cover up the cracks in my heart from losing my best friend because of someone else’s insecurity, how did I think some glue and grout were going to successfully patch this piece of plaster?

So instead of a heart-shaped trivet that I wasn’t overly excited about anyway, I have this.

Memory Glasses by Scraps

Painted canvas base, collaged with photographs and magazine images, beads, buttons and other items, the mosaic broken heart, a light spray of pink spray-paint and silver pen.

Little Tile Steps

64 Arts

So my base finished drying out overnight and I could start on the fun bits.

Trivet In Progress

Trivet in Progress

First thing was to brush the entire surface with the adhesive and then let it get a little tacky (which didn’t take much time) before adding a bit of glue to each tile and arranging them on the plaster base.

I went with a pretty basic pattern and then just filled in the edges because I didn’t exactly center the design. But perfection isn’t what I’m going for, here, it’s an experiment.

The heart shape, well, that’s a project for another post, we’re going to stick with the square for now.

Next is the grout. It’s a good thing I bought an extra packet because I mixed the powder with the recommended amount of water and it was way too thin. So, learn from my mistake: mix a little at a time (the package describes it as oatmeal consistency).

Then you have to glop it all over everything. Gloves are suggested and I don’t think it’s because it’s harmful to your skin (though your manicure might suffer) but more because you can’t just wash this stuff off in the sink. Gloves make it easy to clean-up quickly.

After you mush the grout into all the spaces you let it set for about 10 minutes and then take a damp sponge and wipe away the extra from the tops of the tiles or whatever. Here’s some things the package didn’t tell me that I learned by trial and error:

  1. Use an almost dry sponge (seriously, squeeze almost all the water out) and use a disposable foil pan for your water. If you want to do more than one project you can reuse it or you can ditch it without clogging drains, etc.
  2. Work from one end to the other to avoid smearing damp grout onto the area you’ve already cleared.
  3. Rinse the sponge after every pass.
  4. You can mold edges and at this stage by using a little more water to shape the not-quite-hardened grout.
  5. Leaving some grout on the edges or in crevices within the tiles gives a neat beachy look.
  6. Worried that your tiles are too many, too bright, too whatever? Don’t: the grout tones down the look of the piece.

More pictures this weekend of the finished trivet.

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Looking for something a little more advanced? A while back I wrote an article on Beaded Card Embroidery with a funky art-deco example. It’s a lot like a mosaic but without the grout and other messy stuff. Check it out and give it a try!